Connections – Bridging the Carer Gap

It is amazing how life unfolds. Like a lotus opening each petal has its own challenges but ultimately adds to the beauty of the whole.  It is the connection of each part that supports and nurtures.  Sometimes the contribution of the weakest and most vulnerable is underestimated, but be sure that there is a purpose and a reason, and you will come to an understanding that will wash over you like the crystal waters of a waterfall.

I have learned so much in such a short time.  I have a child with  an acquired brain injury. This fact has delayed any expectation of an empty nest in the near future.  As they say one door closes and another opens and I have found this to be true.


A world of  spiritual and personal growth has expanded and opened.  It is as if the universe has decided to reveal its unlimited dimensions and possibilities through acts of kindness, serendipity and connection.


It has not been easy, but it has been a privilege to be a witness and recipient of these amazing revelations.

Just when you thought it was safe to come out. Boom shackalacka.  This word just seemed to describe the experience so well because it is exactly the way it feels.  First there is the explosion, then your world shakes and the lacka is like you are losing everything.

However, there is something that holds you, grounds you to the truth that you experience. A wise man once said “He who feels it knows it.”  If you have to imagine it then you have to rely on faith, but once you tune into the connection it will hold you through the roughest times.


In the search for understanding and alternative healing  I have been pointed in many interesting directions.  All are faith based but may not seem so at first glance.  People like   Caroline Myss, who said that our connection to our own energy reflects back on us so we better be aware and in control.  Basically, when we love and respect ourselves that energy spreads out positively paying it forward and expands even more.  I have believed this for a long time but having these metaphysical teachers give it a concrete form and detail the intricacies in everyday language is helpful.


Years ago, I read  The Dancing Wu Li Masters by Gary Zukav.  It was a challenging read, but a very rewarding read as it tied science and metaphysical foundations together and your mind had to literally dance with the concepts. This was my introduction to humans as energy beings.  Wow!

We are all connected.  That still small voice within knows this.


Navigating the world of brain injury is not for the faint of heart, but you do become stronger than you can ever imagine.  The faint heart acquires what it needs to get the job done.  Whether that means joining other affected souls on the same path via advocacy groups or falling on your knees in hope and gratitude.


Negativity is learned behavior and our thoughts  become our reality.  It is so liberating to know that you do not have to be a slave to your thoughts. Experiencing is important and all things must pass.  A shift in perspective can carry you through any dark night of the soul.

So make connections that are meaningful and fulfilling.  Nurture connections that will guide  you and help you care for yourself as you care for others.


J. L. James
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J. L. James

Writer at EmptyBesters
Social Commentator, Original EmptyBester.
J. L. James
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2 thoughts on “Connections – Bridging the Carer Gap

  1. Hi Judith, good to see another post. Sounds as if you are on quite a journey of discovery as you progress with supporting your daughter through her experience. I like your analogy of the lotus flower; that’s a good way of describing a new and unexpected caring situation. Although my caring role with my very ancient parents wasn’t exactly unexpected, it is uncharted waters for me and my sister and as you say, it’s like lotus petals unfolding. I have to admit, I don’t like some of the petals we are presented with though! But children caring for aging parents is more the natural order of life than parents caring for adult children. Therefore we never have cause to feel upset at what is happening. Sad as it is at times, it’s all natural and expected. So I would imagine your own brain is in a constant state of background bewilderment even as you willingly do what is needed, because this wasn’t meant to happen. Life can throw some incredible curve balls at times but from what you are saying, it sounds as though they can open up some very positive experiences for those who catch them. Thinking of you and your family as you meet the challenges, highs, lows and joys of this experience.

    1. Always appreciate your thoughtful comments Gilly. I think being a carer is challenging because we retain the memories of how the person was pre care need. We move to accepting that who the may be currently is different but equal, and the love is still there.

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